Moth version 2

Guest what? The moth is still inside my office!. I had three table lamps taken out from a suite and put them in my office for temporary storage. Tonight i noticed my old friend Mr. Moth hanging around at one of the lampshades........

Dusk In Kenyir

A view from where i'm sitting now at 7.25pm at Kenyir................................

Moth and Mosque

Scene of Masjid Tengku Tengah Zaharah or more well known as Masjid Terapung last night. Quite captivating............. Excuse the quality though, only taken using my HP camera....

This moth happens to land on my calender and stayed there for  two straight days without moving. I thought it was dead but when i disturbed it a little it moved, so i just leave it alone until this morning it moved away. Why it chose to stay there i dunno and what does it means i also dunno.....

The Loneliness ~ Babyface

I'm sitting here
Thinking bout
How I'm gonna do without
You around in my life and how am I
Gon' get by
Ain't got no days
Just lonely nights
You want the truth
Well girl I'm not alright
Feel out of place and out of time
I think I'm gonna lose my mind
[Chorus]
So tell me how you feel (I'm lonely)
Are you for real (so lonely)
Do you still think of me (I think of you)
Baby still (You only)
Do you dream of me at night (like I dream of you all the time)
So let me tell you how it feels (its like everyday I die)
Wish I was dreaming but its real (when I open up my eyes)
Let me tell you how it feels (and don't see your pretty face)
I think that I will never love again
[Verse 2]
I miss your face
I miss your kiss
I even miss the arguments
That we would have from time to time
I miss you standing by my side
I'm dying here its clear to see
There ain't no you, God knows there ain't no me
Don't wanna live, I wanna die
If I cant have you in my life
[Chorus (repeat till end)]
So tell me how you feel (I'm lonely)
Are you for real (so lonely)
Do you still think of me (I think of you)
Baby still (You only)
Do you dream of me at night (like I dream of you all the time, so lonely)
Oh let me tell you how it feels (its like everyday I die)
Wish I was dreaming but its real (when I open up my eyes)
Let me tell you how it feels (and don't see your pretty face)
I think that I will never love again

Goodbye My Lover ~ James Blunt

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.

Cold Night

Cold night

hear me cry

for this shall be 

my final lullaby

Cold night

hold me tight

as i need

to fend this fright

cold night

blanket me in warmth

as i feel coldness

of life's final wrath

cold night

help me to say goodbye

as i endure

the final days of this miserable life

Rape Me My Friend

This song by Nirvana has always been my fav amongst all since so many years ago. The main reason is the symbolism of hurt and anguish felt by Cobain of the trusted people surrounding him which are using him for their own interest.

Sometimes I also felt the same. Some friends continously use you for their own purposes. What hurts some more is that this friend is also a close one. And for that persons interest, i felt like i'm continously being used again and again and again. I mean, I have nothing to gain by helping this person. In fact, by helping this person... it's like slowly hurting my soul due to what has happened in the past. But ... dunno la dudes, it's difficult to turn down a person's request for help and assistance. That being the person that i am. But can't this person stop and look around for a while... can't this person see what he/she is doing is victimising me as a friend to do something that is hurting me also. Does this person have any heart to spare to see me in this state of health to force myself some more to help. To plead with me... i mean.. who is going to help me then after this because definitely i would be forgotten................. 

At the end of the day... you would only require a friend like me when you are in need...... what about  me..... to be left to rot like a decaying piece of rag..... Rape me my friend...... again and again..........................

One day I hope you would truly open your eyes and really see..... 

Rape me,
Rape me my friend 
Rape me,
Rape me again 

I'm not the only one 


Hate me
Do it and do it again  
Waste me, 
Rape me ,my friend.

I'm not the only one

My favorite inside source 
I'll kiss your open sores 
Appreciate your concern 
You'll always stink and burn

Rape me,
Rape me my friend
Rape me,
Rape me again

Im not the only one

My Lunch Today

This is prepared by the Chef for me , Talapia Bakar with Garam Kunyit only. Grilled under the Salamander to ensure no oil is used.

This was prescribed by the the doctor, a special milk for diabetecs to replace rice. Just one glass is enough to replace all the nutrients in a plate of rice minus the sugar content.

This was not eaten by me but the chef who wallop this plate of Nasi Kerabu Daging Bakar in front of me. Make my mouth watery you know...hahahahaha

Bila Rasaku Ini Rasamu ~ Kerispatih

Aku Memang Terlanjur Mencintaimu

Dan Tak Pernah Ku Sesali Itu

Seluruh Jiwa Telah Ku Serahkan

Menggenggam Janji Setiaku
Kumohon Jangan Jadikan Semua Ini

Alasan Kau Menyakitiku

Meskipun Cintamu Tak Hanya Untukku

Tapi Cobalah Sejenak Mengerti
- Bila Rasaku Ini Rasamu -

Sanggupkah Engkau Menahan Sakitnya

Terkhianati Cinta Yang Kau Jaga
Coba Bayangkan Kembali

Betapa Hancurnya Hati Ini Kasih

Semua Telah Terjadi

Kekasih

This poem was written by Datuk Usman Awang, SN.... the title speaks for itself....

Kekasih

Akan kupintal buih-buih              menjadi tali              mengikatmu akan kuanyam gelombang-gelombang              menjadi hamparan              ranjang tidurmu akan kutenun awan-gemawan              menjadi selendang              menudungi rambutmu akan kujahit bayu gunung              menjadi baju              pakaian malammu akan kupetik bintang timur              menjadi kerongsang              menyinari dadamu akan kujolok bulan gerhana              menjadi lampu              menyuluhi rindu akan kurebahkan matari              menjadi laut malammu              menghirup sakar madumu Kekasih, hitunglah mimpi              yang membunuh realiti              dengan syurga ilusi.

Do Not Go Gentle Into The Good Night

This poem was written by Dylan Thomas, a welsh poet who was said to be a nuerotic since an early age. Born in 1914, he lived a short live until the age of 39 and passed away in 1953 due to alcoholism. Most of his poems are related to death and this particular one is my fav. This is about staring death in the face and rage and fight till the end. That is how he envisioned death...  Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night

Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Though wise men at their end know dark is right, Because their words had forked no lightning they Do not go gentle into that good night. Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight, And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way, Do not go gentle into that good night. Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. And you, my father, there on that sad height, Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.  Dylan Thomas

Matahariku ~ Agnes Monica

Tertutup sudah pintu .. pintu hatiku
Yang pernah dibuka waktu hanya untukmu
Kini kau pergi dari hidupku
Kuharus relakanmu walau aku tak mau

Berjuta warna pelangi didalam hati
Sejenak luluh bergening menjauh pergi
Takada lagi cahaya suci
Semua nada beranjak aku terdiam sepi

Dengarlah matahariku suara tangisanku
Kubersedih kerna panah cinta menusuk jantungku
Ucapkan matahariku puisi tentang hidupku
Tentangku yang tak mampu menaklukan waktu

Berjuta warna pelangi didalam hati
Sejenak luluh bergening menjauh pergi
Takada lagi cahaya suci
Semua nada beranjak aku terdiam sepi

Tag Dari Rhea

7 Ciri Wanita Idaman

1. Pipi Tembam

haha.... dari dulu aku akan tergoda dengan wanita yang pipi tembam. Ex aku dulu semuanya pipi gerenti tembam. Even ex fiance aku cakap dulu, kalau aku curang pon mesti pompuan tu pipi tembam. Tapi yang kantoi dia pulak yang curang.... hahaha

2. Kuat semangat

Aku memang akan tertarik dengan wanita yang mempunyai semangat yang utuh. Sebab tu biasanya wanita pilihan aku biasanya anak sulong. Secara kebetulan kot sebab biasanya anak sulong ni keras sikit. Aku tak suka yang jenis lembik dan terlalu mengharapkan lelaki dalam semua hal. Wanita pilihan aku mestilah independent dan berani.

3. Suka berkomunikasi

Aku prefer wanita yang boleh berkomunikasi dan tak banyak menyimpan rahsia dan suka suruh lelaki baca pemikiran diorang as though semua lelaki ni ada telephatic power. Susah nak baca fikiran orang ni kadang kadang dan biasanya kalau jenis menduga ni.. last last sekali gaduh.

4. Open minded

Open minded maksudnya di sini ialah boleh berbicara dalam banyak hal tanpa prejudis dan salah sangka. Aku tak suka yang jenis tengok orang lain terus kutuk kalau ada apa apa yang tak kena.

5. Suara lembut

Suara wanita banyak mempengaruhi lelaki terutama dalam melembutkan hati lelaki. Aku suka yang bersuara lembut dan manja.

6. Romantis

Oleh sebab aku ni romantik( semua ex aku cakap begitu, bukan aku masuk lif tekan sendiri ya) jadi sudah pasti aku nak wanita yang romantis juga. Aku ni kat luar je nampak garang.. hehehehe.. dalam sanubari aku memang inginkan sentuhan wanita dalam suasana yang romantis. aku juga sukakan belaian dan dibelai. Sebab tu aku prefer kalau aku dapat spend masa yang panjang dengan pasangan aku. Dan aku suka berdua(Bukan khalwat ya), x suka tempat yang bising bila bersama pasangan.

7. Ajaran agama yang secukupnya

Memang ini idaman aku sebab aku ni dah semakin berumur. Dah rasa sesikit rasa kekesalan atas apa yang pernah aku lakukan dan ingin rasanya aku pasangan yang dapat membantu mengingatkan aku jika aku lalai dalam kehidupan seharian.


7 wanita yang pernah anda minati sepanjang hidup

1. Sakura(I know you would read this my dear) -korang jgn salah sangka. ni bukan nick sakura kat JL ya.
2. Ex tunang aku ler
3. Ex girlfriend aku ler masa sekolah menengah
4. ex girlfriend kat college
5.
6.
7.

7 Perasaan sekiranya keluar dengan seseorang yang anda minati
(ini kalau aku keluar dengan mok cik aku sekarang)

1. Comfortable
2. Happy
3. Overwhelmed
4. In Love la of course
5. All of the above
6. All of the above twice over
7. All of the above over and over again and again

7 tempat istimewa yang ingin dilawati bersama pasangan anda

1.Rumah aku kat kampung sebab tanah luas dan dia suka bercucuk tanam
2.Mekah- sebab aku dah janji nak bawak dia pi umrah kalau jadi
3. Pantai Irama (Bachok, Kelantan) tempat aku dibesarkan
4. Cameron Highlands ( tempat favourite aku)
5. Seychelles( memadu asmara di sana)
6. Morocco( aku memang simpan cita cita nak melawat sana)
7. Mana mana yang dia nak pergi sebab aku pasti ingin sentiasa bersamanya

7 Barangan/sesuatu istimewa yang anda ingin hadiahkan kepada pasangan anda

1. Kebahagian
2. Kasih sayang sepanjang hayat
3. Kemanjaan
4. Cinta(of course)
5. Perhatian
6. Doa
7. ingin aku hapuskan air mata dia sekarang

7 tajuk lagu yang ingin dinyanyikan untuk pasangan anda

1. Unbreak my heart
2. Callin' u
3. Kenangan terindah
4. Hanya kau yang mampu
5. Pelangi petang
6. Ku petik bintang bintang
7. You light up my life

7 rakan yang di tag untuk buat perihal ini

Tak dapat nak fikir sekarang

Unbreak My Heart ~ Toni Braxton

I remembered that somebody dedicated to me this song in December 2006. I never thought that this song would be most meanigfull to me one day and i would dedicate this song to somebody now.............. 

Don't leave me in all this pain 
Don't leave me out in the rain 
Come back and bring back my smile 
Come and take these tears away 
I need your arms to hold me now 
The nights are so unkind 
Bring back those nights when I held you beside me 
Un-break my heart 
Say you'll love me again 
Undo this hurt you caused 
When you walked out the door 
And walked outta my life 
Un-cry these tears 
I cried so many nights 
Un-break my heart 
My heart 

Take back that sad word good-bye 
Bring back the joy to my life 
Don't leave me here with these tears 
Come and kiss this pain away 
I can't forget the day you left 
Time is so unkind 
And life is so cruel without you here beside me 

Un-break my heart 
Say you'll love me again 
Undo this hurt you caused 
When you walked out the door 
And walked outta my life 
Un-cry these tears 
I cried so many nights 
Un-break my heart 
My heart 

Don't leave me in all this pain 
Don't leave me out in the rain 
Bring back the nights when I held you beside me 

Un-break my heart 
Say you'll love me again 
Undo this hurt you caused 
When you walked out the door 
And walked outta my life 
Un-cry these tears 
I cried so many, many nights 
Un-break my 

Un-break my heart 
Come back and say you love me 
Un-break my heart 
Sweet darlin' 
Without you I just can't go on 
Can't go on